Uncensored Money Season Four: Are You Being Too Boring and Safe?

Melissa Browne: Ex-Accountant, Ex-Financial Advisor, Ex-Working Till I Drop, Now Serial Entrepreneur & Author, Financial Wellness Advocate, Living a Life by Design | 26/04/2023

 

Show Notes


In this episode, Mel and Lawsie discuss why many people are being too boring and safe, why that’s dangerous and how to step out of your comfort zone and create a remarkable life. 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

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Transcript

Mel: Seth Godin, the New York marketing guru wrote a blog over a decade ago with the headline, You're Boring. Just so you know, this is an uplifting podcast episode today. Now, he could have changed that headline to You're Beige or You're Unremarkable, or You Are Too Safe and if you are a business owner, being beige or boring, especially in today's day and age, I think is the kiss of death.

Seth went on to say that if you are in business, there's probably a reason you're boring. And I guess that's what boring means, right? And you're probably boring on purpose. You have boring pricing because it's safer. You have a boring location because to do so otherwise would be crazy. You have boring products because that's what you think the market wants.

That boring staff, they're perfectly well qualified, but are they actually the right fit? Your products are predictable, your insights are recycled, or now they're directly from Chat GPT without you even putting any thought into it. You don't bring surprise with you when you enter a room, and that's potentially why people are ignoring you. Which used to be fine because you could just buy attention for your brand or your company or your sales efforts, but that half price sale and attention is now over. And according to Seth, the only path left is to lean out of the edge and become interesting, noteworthy and yes, remarkable. You don't get un onboarding for free.

Remarkable costs, time and money and effort, but most of all, remarkable costs are willingness to be wrong. Remarkable is a choice. He wrote this blog Lawsie, more than a decade ago. It was 2009. And I was just reminded of it this week because you and I are in a state of change at the moment. And I think it's truer today than it ever was.

This concept of 'your safe is boring' and I think I would add on to that it's also dangerous not just for your business, but for your finances. And I wanna unpack that with you today. Because another way to think about it is, am I taking enough of a risk? Because you can wrap yourself in cotton wool and feel safe, and sometimes that's my preferred state physically. It's not for you Lawsie, but is that the best thing for you? The science says that a little stress is actually healthy for you. Lifting weights and putting stress on your bones is actually really good for your body. And the same can be true for your business and your finances.

And when we think finances and business, we often don't want to think stress. We often wanna think anti-stress and the removal of stress, particularly in rising interest rates, rising cost of living. But I wanna challenge you a little bit today that perhaps your safe is not just boring, but is actually dangerous.

Now, Lawsie. For people listening, we want them to be remarkable, both in their finances and in their business if they have one, that might not be what they wanna choose for themselves today, but that's what we want. Because being remarkable means you have choice, and that's when you hear me say remarkable today, that's what I want you to think. I want you to think I am the master of my own destiny. I can write my own story. It's all up to me kind of thing.

Lawsie: Ooh, I'm just gonna keep adding sound, little sound effects.

Mel: We're so fancy.

Because when we are remarkable, we have choice. So today we wanna unpack why we think people are being boring and safe. I think it's pretty obvious, but we wanna unpack that a little bit. We wanna go on to share how we've been that way ourselves. And God, my hand is firmly up with that one, which people don't necessarily look at me and think I'm unsafe.

Oh my gosh, I have been boring. So boring. We wanna share how we're choosing not to be boring, and we wanna share some tips around how you can choose to be remarkable and to have choice, whether that's your business or your finances.

So I guess I wanna kickstart it by just sharing maybe some examples so that people, if you're listening, you can really start to hear what we're talking about when we say boring.

Because I think when it comes to business, all of those examples that I gave are really easy and I think people can identify it in their business. There's such a sea of sameness in business. I've got a really good friend who wants to do what I do and won't, I don't think successfully, simply because they're not willing to put themselves out there and for people to judge them.

I've got another friend that I'm thinking of who was in exactly that same boat. And she made the conscious choice that she didn't care what people thought because her business and the objects of her business were more important than what her friends thought of her when she was, in their words, playing the fool on social media.

And I think that for me has been a huge one. I've had to get over myself when it comes to social media. I think what I'm a really great, implementer. I think I'm really great at creating things. I think I'm terrible at selling. And I also think I've been terrible at showing up consistently.

And I am the kid who hated having my photo taken growing up. So you won't see many photos of me as a teenager. I love seeing teenagers doing all the selfies now. I'm like, kill me now. There are no photos. And if they do, I'm so awkward. So for me, it was a huge deal to put myself forward and to do it in a way that was different.

And I guess the only reason for me that I did was Covid. Covid when that happened, it was more important to me that I put information out there in a timely manner that people could digest and understand than I cared if people thought that, oh my God, look at her hair, it's ratty, or, oh my God, she's a bit old for this, or, oh God, that lighting's terrible for me.

The information was too important, so I got over myself in that moment. And now I purposefully try to be different. And again I know of one friend. Who has said to his partner oh God what is she doing now? And his partner says, just unfollow her if it's a problem. And I think that too. I know what I do is not for everyone and I'm really okay with that. But I think it takes a while for you to get there. And that's where I think I'm really grateful for my western suburbs roots, where I'm a bogan at heart. I didn't grow up with that private school 'this is how you have to look'. If anything, my childhood and how we grew up was so inconsistent and messy that anything's an improvement. So I think there's that.

We've been boring with personal finances my husband. And I've told this story in books and different times before. When I met him, he had cash but not a lot of assets. And his boring and safe was that he didn't have time to invest. So he just put cash in the bank and he tells the story of all the opportunities he missed out on by not investing. And I used to kick himself and I had to say to him, you can kick yourself or we can do something about that. Because he absolutely lost, like that money would be 5, 6, 7 times what he had if he had actually done something with it. But for him, it was safer in the bank.  And again, that's where just pressing pause because you're too busy or you don't have time to spend on it is dangerous.

Lawsie: Yeah.

Mel: The third example I wanna share is me with my city apartment. So I've got a home in Glenbrook, the Tone, and I, my husband, we bought so fast. It wasn't a dream house by any stretch of the imagination. We just had some things that we really wanted and it ticked the boxes.

But with the city apartment, for me, I felt like it just didn't really make sense financially. Tone really wanted it. He wanted to be able to hang art on the wall. He wanted it, and I kept saying but we could do some investment properties instead. He's no, I really wanna own it and I appreciate I'm talking from a place of privilege here, but because it was an emotional decision, I took three years to decide to buy that freaking apartment.

And again, just like Tony's sitting on cash decision that absofreakinglutely cost us. I reckon we paid at least 50% more than if we'd done it the three years before.

 So I wanted to share examples of boring and safe that I've made both business and personal. So that you could hear what we are talking about here, because I think we all do it either because it's a big decision or we're uncertain or we don't wanna be judged or what have you. But in every situation, it's costing us.

Lawsie: Yeah. Oh, I agree. And I think yeah, for me, there are the times of obviously from my little employee position is staying in a job longer than you actually should. When you are the job is no longer serving. When you're not delivering and putting your best foot forward.

And I think particularly when you're working in government and you hear all the stories, oh, government's so safe. You stay in things longer than you should. I can even remember back when I was at uni I was obviously studying accounting, but questioning it going, but why? But why? But everything else around me was saying no, but this is really good. You're in this great gig…

Mel: It's boring, safe.

Lawsie: you like you're on a cadet program. You're working for the government and the government's paying for your degree. Like this is all lovely and it absolutely is safe and the degree was incredibly boring.

But I mean it's obviously led to different opportunities and stuff since then. So I can still look back with hindsight and go, gee, I'm glad I stuck that out. And there are so many pros from it, but at the time you go, yeah, I was absolutely playing it safe and it was boring. I stayed in different roles, obviously prior to working for you. Stayed in other roles and positions longer than I should've wanted because I was just like, oh, I don't really know what else I'll do. And hey, it's government and it's safe, and all of those things. You do just keep going and sure it would've been, could have been fine. I'm sure I'd be even more crazy than I am now had I stayed there and not moved on to the next thing. But it is definitely an example of playing safe or even we bought our own home and then like just didn't really do anything for a few years.

And I know that we hear about that so often now with people we work with inside the My Financial Adulting Plan where that's what they've done. They're like, awesome. I've ticked that box and then that's it. To your point that you're saying with Tony there's still other things that you need to be doing with your finances. It's not just a case of buy a house and have some money in the bank, like you need to be doing more than that. And you need to step out of what you feel is no doubt, safe and comfortable and is I guess we can be a bit judging or it's a bit boring, like you just have a house and maybe some cash in the bank.

 And obviously that's where we're wanting to encourage you to be doing more and it's super important with those things.

Mel: Or the reverse of, I can't, I don't think I'm ever gonna be able to afford to buy a house, so therefore I'm just going to, I'm not gonna worry. I'm not gonna bother. And again, you might think that's safe to go, oh, I'll just save. Or I'll just follow what everyone else is doing. And that's the default can actually be super problematic.

I know with my accounting firm as well, it's interesting saying your experience with the employee. That was my experience with the business as well as, that I held onto that longer than I should have. And my heart just wasn't in it at the end, but I stayed in it because I didn't know what or who I would do. I wouldn't know what I would, that was a Freudian slip, what I would do or who I was if I was to sell it. And yes, the timing ended up being beautiful and I've stepped into something that fills me up and is perfect for me and what I wanna do and what you wanna do. Again, it's that just staying too long and being too safe. So I guess it's really hard, I think, when we're in uncertain times to talk about, when we're in interest rate rises, when we're in inflation rising to say, don't be boring. But actually it's more important than ever before not to be. We don't just want you to press pause on your business or to be safe in your business. We don't want you to just press pause financially. We want you to actually do more. And we are going to share with you we're gonna share a little bit of that now around how we see people being too boring and safe, but also for tips for how to move out of that, because it's one thing to know it. And then it's another thing to go, that's nice. What do I do now?

So we’ll share a few things at each where we see people being too boring or safe now.

I think language. And I know we've talked about it before, but using 'just' to describe your business. Pricing somewhere in the middle and not actually doing your research and valuing what your customer wants, not listening to your customer and asking what next. Not being scared to stand out. The number of people that still continue to copy our emails or sales pages or social media posts, etc and then wonder why they're not getting the same result. You've gotta figure out what's right for you and for what your audience is. What can make you stand out? What's your special source?

Because my special source is kind of Harvard meets Vogue with some geek and dork in there. That's not gonna be yours. So you gotta find the thing that's uniquely you, and figure it out. Awkwardness absolutely is my special source. Someone else that's super polished is not gonna have that. So it's figuring out what's unique for you.

 But I talked about it before with Tony having too much money in cash and pressing pause. Either pressing pause because you wanna wait to see what the share market's doing, or wait to see what the housing market's doing. Investing is a long-term game. So if you've got that long term, if you can afford to hold it for the long term, if you are investing regularly with shares or if you have that long-term mindset with property, then yes, you could be buying it on the highs and the low or the lows. But unless you've got a crystal ball, you're just not gonna know it. And I've told the story here before about how when I bought my Glenbrook home, it did not move in 10 years. It did not move in value. Did I kick myself? No, because it was my home.

So if it was my long-term view, I knew I could hold onto it. So it did, it was irrelevant that it didn't move. So again it's blocking out a lot of that noise. And we'll talk about it. We'll talk about that today. But Lawsie, you would have some other ideas as well.

Lawsie: Yeah, I think in some ways that some people play it boring or playing it too safe is just not even questioning the things before they do it. Like I think particularly in Australia, there's still a lot of that you grow up, you buy a house and you get married or whatever. And I think it's actually about challenging some of those beliefs as well, because they probably do feel, and for some people they are boring, but they're also just not the right thing. Like it's not for everybody, it's not the right thing to buy their home. For me, it was absolutely the right thing. I like knowing that I've got somewhere that is mine, despite the fact that I still just wanna go out and travel and do all of the things. For others, they really just want that nomadic lifestyle and buying a home isn't right. But they do it because they feel like they have to. And I would say that they're just following what's deemed to be safe and it's easy. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to have those somewhat sometimes awkward conversations if your parents are the ones that are going…

Mel: You gotta buy a house.

Lawsie: All of those things. So you stick to what's what they're deeming is safe and you stick to what society or your friends and things are doing.

And it's just not the right thing, but you're doing it because you think it's safe and you have to. So I think there's definitely that where people aren't challenging what the expectations are of them because it's easier to not do it.

Mel: And they're going down the default boring path, which is right for so many people, but it's also wrong for so many people. So it's actually questioning it.

Lawsie: Yeah. And I think doing that, and then there's as we said before, those that just, they've managed to save up the deposit, they've bought the house, and then that's it. And I'm like, that's too safe and that's too boring. And then all the conversations that we have with so many people where they almost know that they should be doing more, but to them, they feel it's safer to not invest in their financial occasion, education and knowledge and awareness, and know how to start to invest in shares or understand why you don't just wanna keep dollars in the bank, and how that could actually be sending you backwards even though they're thinking that's safe and even though it is super boring. It's like I get paid, the money goes in my bank, into my savings account. Done like that is very boring and for some people they need to do that. They need to build up some cash, but for the most part it's, yeah, I think it's just really important that people start to challenge those stories and ideas and stuff that are around that are the more traditional, standard, potentially boring paths to work at, is that the right thing for them? And then once you have ticked off some of those things, it's then continuing to challenge that and go, okay, well next?

Mel: Absolutely. So I guess what we wanna do before we get into tips for how you could move out of being too safe or too boring to being remarkable and having options is just share how we are choosing not to be boring now.

Lawsie: Oh, we've never been boring. Look at us

Mel: Personally my husband let's throw Tone under the bus. Tone. We had a, we've had a lot of discussions over the last few months, and my husband, he's so incredibly good at what he does. He's an extraordinary physio, and what lights him up is working with teams. I've known that, yeah, there was a brief interlude there in between when he was with Panthers and when he was with paddling where he didn't, I think I had him for two years or three years where he didn't do it.

But he's lit up when he's working with teams and he now is working with he just happens to work with a program where he will travel overseas for three months of the year, and I can't travel with him because, It just won't work because of how, just how the program works. We've looked into it. But it also means that before he decided to do all this, we had thought that we would go and spend three months living overseas. But obviously that just won't work now with the season that we are in. So instead of us looking like we will wind, starting to wind down because we actually have the option to do, I had to look at it and go, all right if you are gonna do that and live your best life, what do I wanna do?

 Because I want that for you. So let's, how could I have it for me too? So for me, meant that I don't wanna be boring either, i. It's making sure personally that I am fulfilled both in business and personally.

So for personal. I've got different wealth creation goals now where I know I've talked here before where I have the option to work or not.

But, and I know you and I have had this discussion before where you're like, Mel, like why? But now I'm like how much could I kick it and what would that next level look like? And also how much could I give back if I was to do that? That really lights me up. But also to look at the business and to go. He's so lit up by working in teams, I'm so lit up by transformation. That's the thing that gets me outta bed. I'm obsessive about the results that we have in the people that go through our programs, and I know you are too. We're constantly tinkering and tweaking and doing more. So for us, we really want away the next three push it as far as we can to say instead of being comfortable with the size that the businesses now, let's five or 10 times it. Let's really create a community where we have a say when it comes to policy, where we can actually change. Instead of winging on International Women's Day about freaking pay gaps and all the rest of it. We can say hand on our heart cause of our survey results we did something about. Look at the movement we've created, and I'm freaking excited about that. And it's interesting because it's scary for me, when I sold the accounting firm, I never wanted teams again. And I don't count you as team because we've just been working together for so long that this is just what we do.

 But it's going to mean having team and looking for potentially marketing and all the rest of it. And I'm not gonna enjoy the building of that, but the outcome, I'm so excited about that I'm happy for it to be more remarkable than the boring that it could be. And it has the ability to be boring if we were to let it. It could be great and safe and amazing.

Lawsie: It would be

Mel: And it would be so boring.

Lawsie: Boring for you. The course, let's just put that out there, the courses are not boring.

Mel: The course is freaking but it would be boring for me. And I think there would definitely come a point. I mean it, it'll become more competitive and I don't want that either.

Like I wanna be, I'm one of the first people to have run a course. I think it's the only course of its type that exists. I want it to be the frigging best. I want women, a woman or a couple go, oh my gosh, I wanna sort myself out financially. They go we just have to join the My Financial Adulting Plan. Like that's, that's the course. We can try others on the way there, but that's the one we're gonna, we want to end up at. So I'm really excited about that. So that's how we are choosing not to be boring now, which is a little bit of a vulnerable share, but that's alright.

Lawsie: Oh it's only really you and me looking at each other at the moment record this, you're fine

Mel: I'm pain meds still I blame them.

Lawsie: But I think it's being able to apply that to like absolutely that's like the business stuff, which business is

Mel: Yes, it's true.

Lawsie: you, you just can't help yourself. But it is that like we could absolutely keep it the way that it is now, and it would be successful and we would go, yes, this is awesome, but by you choosing to not be boring and not to be playing it safe and to really put yourself out there and want to achieve those big things, like it is scary, but imagine what we're actually gonna be able to create as a result of that.

And I think that everyone should be doing that with their personal lives as well. Like I know even if I was to go back and look into my early twenties, it was very much the safe, boring path. Get married, sorry Adam, you're not boring. Get married, buy a house and then we veered off what the traditional trajectory is.

But also in making this step to that decision to step away from accounting and do those things, like a lot of people are like, oh, that's a big step. And I'm like, oh. I'm done. There can be no more. But it was and that was the right thing for me, but I know that people looking at that as being, ooh that's so much uncertainty.

 All of those things with it. And I'm like, yeah, but that's okay. It'll be fine. But I think it's then doing the same thing personally, then projecting it and going, actually where do I want to be? And you like, as like I'm very much around wood wanting to get myself set up so it's like it is still that option to work and I still want to work, but I want work to be the experience.

So like I obviously love what we are doing, but I also look at it and go, I wanna be able to go overseas for three months or six months and just live my best life. I'm so happy to work. Like I still have this thing, but it's not even gonna be a thing by the time I finally do it go to Italy and pick my grapes and then crushed them with my feet to make wine. Like that to me is the experience of it. And that lights me up in the same way that for you to grow the business and stuff

lights, you are, but I think it's challenging.

Mel: To drag you around to art galleries all through your year.

Lawsie: Yeah, but it's to challenge the norm and then go, it's not like it's not safe for me to go potentially I, in a few years, I might go, I'm done and I am just gonna go in I've set myself up enough now because of, again, the non-safe and the non-boring things that I've been doing financially personally to then go, all right, Italy and grapes, here I come my poor feet or nor the wine will ever be the same again.

I think to be able to challenge that. And unless you do challenge that and have that time to have the bigger thoughts around what is it that you actually want? Then you don't necessarily have that motivation to go, all right, how can I step away from what is currently safe if you're getting to that season where it is actually the right thing for you to step out of that.

Mel: And we're not saying that you have to have a non-traditional life, and we're also not saying you have to be in a position where you can just step out. We're saying to choose to not be boring. To choose to not be safe. And by that, what we are saying is, to not just default to what everyone else is doing, because what we know is that financial literacy is declining. And what you and I know Lawsy more than anything is that people want a choice financially. And what we see every single day is that actions and decisions they're making are robbing them of choice. So it's, making the non-boring, risky decision to go, you know what? I'm gonna step off the hamster wheel. I'm gonna step off the merry-go-round and actually get back in the driver's seat and take charge of this beautiful life, which includes your finances.

Lawsie: But we should add, you do still wanna have a little bit of safe and boring with your finances.

 

Mel: Yes. We want buffer accounts, we want automation, we want all of that sort of stuff. We're not talking about that here.

Lawsie: We wanna keep that stuff happening. But yeah, bigger picture.

Mel: Yes, definitely. So what does it look like? If you are inspired, we're gonna run you briefly through some tips for how you could move from being too safe or too boring to being remarkable and having options. And you could apply this to your business. You could apply this to your personal finances or really I think any part of your life. We will inspire some action.

So Lawsie, I reckon we go through these one by one. So I'll kick off with the, and again, you're gonna hear some boring stuff and you're gonna hear some quite interestingly.

 And you are also gonna hear stuff we've talked about before, because you've gotta understand where you're at and what you want. You can't choose to not be beige if you don't know where you're at and you don't know what you want. And that's where I see people going wrong all the time. For example, other course creators will look across at me and go, I want to be where she is. So I'll just do exactly what she's doing. I won't look at where she started. I won't look at where I am. I won't look at who my customer is or anything. I'll just replicate it. And what we know is whether it's exercise, whether it's personal finances, whether it's business, copying and pasting most of the time just doesn't work. So you've gotta understand where you're at and what you want. And again, everything we are gonna go through today, we cover in modules in the My Financial Adulting Plan. So if this is resonating, in the show notes, we'll put a link to the waitlist. Make sure you jump on so you know when doors are open so that we can actually get you to this point where you are no longer beige.

Number two, Lawsie. I think this one's so important, so easy to say.

Lawsie: Yes. Reduce the noise around other people's opinions, which I know we've touched on a little bit here anyway, but just to hammer that one home. Once you are clear about where you are at and where you're wanting to go and when you've got that sense of direction, it is just people are gonna have opinions. They can't help themselves and you are gonna be excited because you're like, oh, this is amazing. This is where I'm wanting to go, or I'm tweaking these things and whatever, doesn't matter how small or how big those steps are for the things that you're changing, but people will always have opinions. And people's default is going to be generally to not put you down, but be like, Ooh is that the right thing for you? And again, that's got that potential to push you back into that safe and boring space which you are \ desperately trying to, or maybe not desperately, but you are trying to step out of and you're excited about it, which is why you're sharing with them.

So with that, I think you need to be conscious around the people that you tell. If there's someone that's gonna really dull your shine with it, you might choose not to tell them until you've done it. Whereas if you know that there are others that are gonna be really supportive of you, then you might tell 'em because they're gonna give you a boost.

But you also need in some regards maybe have, if you've got people whose opinion you value and can be quite objective, then you might also decide to run things by them because you can trust that they're gonna give the pros and cons for it and not just be the negative naysayers or the, oh, that's amazing. I'm so excited for you without actually doing the deep dive into what it is that you're doing, but I think it's just really important that you make sure you reduce that noise around you so that you can stay committed to what it is that you're wanting to do. Or if you are talking to people that you take their feedback selectively to make sure that you don't just go back into the safe and boring little box. That you are making sure that their feedback and stuff is helping you still get to where you want to be. 

Mel: And sometimes that feedback comes from a place of love, but that love I and kindness is actually not helpful. So I'm sure when you stop being an accountant, maybe your parents or someone else has said to you over time, Ooh, you sure about that? And it's done with good intentions and it's also done from their point of view because, oh, that's safe.

But again, if it's understanding how can I turn down the noise around what other people's opinions are? And that might even be unfollowing people on social media that you know you’re gonna wanna keep up with them And that's going to distract me or it's just not listening to comments. I've forced unfollows on my social. I remember when I was in Europe last year, I did something and someone sent me a DM to say, I don't follow you for that sort of tomfoolery, so can you just knock it off? So I just force the unfollow it's easy. I'm not here for everyone. And I've done it for friends as well, where I know they have a problem with what I'm doing. So I just mute them. Cause I'm like, you don't need to see it's obviously bugging you, so it's okay.

Lawsie: I'll set you free

Mel: I'll see you free. But you can do that as well and they'll never know. But to your counterpoint, Lawsie, it's also to surround yourself with cheerleaders and those further ahead than you, because sometimes you want people that have your back. I've got a core group that point out my bias, so show me the things that I'm missing, but also will absolutely waive the pom-poms for me.

And those two things are so important, but also you want those further ahead than you. In business it meant that I joined groups where they were so much further in business than me and it was really helpful cause a), I learned from them, but also I looked at them and went, you guys (and they were mainly guys) you guys aren't any smarter than me. Who am I not to be doing what you are doing? Actually, I'm smarter than a lot of you. What the hell? And it's that whole monkey see, monkey do. And sometimes, and I think that's the power of the community of the My Financial Adulting Plan, is people, and we see it every week where someone might say, oh, I'm really struggling with this, or I'm struggling with that, and just the chorus. And the cheerleading that turns out for people going, I've been there. This is what worked for me. Or I did that, you've got this. And I love that because it is hearing from people that are further along than you and if they can do it, I can do it.

Lawsie: Yes. Super important, I think. And then our next one is my favourite. Decide what you're prepared to suffer for and choose to get uncomfortable.

Mel: You love getting uncomfortable.

Lawsie: Oh, not the, no, but I do the whole suffer. It's very dark, isn't it? Whatcha are you gonna suffer for? We, but I actually think that this is something that is super important, because again, if you're gonna step out of the safe and the boring, then there's gonna be sacrifices for that.

 If I was to put it on me and go, yeah, I really wanna go and do my stint and pick grapes in Italy. That's lovely, but the only way I'm gonna get there is by making other sacrifices now and being more disciplined with what I'm doing with my finances, being consistent, because it's not gonna be a short-term fix. It is a long-term goal that you've gotta be committed to. So there's going to be some sacrifices, that's very deep in sacrifices to be able to actually get there. And so 'suffer' might seem a little bit hard, but it's like when people say, oh, I'd really like to buy a house. Okay, that's nice. What's your timeframe for that? How much do you wanna spend? And then by the time they look at that, sometimes they're horrified. It's like oh, there's gonna be an impact. I'm not gonna be able to go out as much. I'm not gonna buy everything, those shoes and that bag and those clothes and things. So it's what are you prepared to suffer for?

And if the thing that you're stepping outside of safe and boring for is enough and means enough to you, you'll do it because you'll decide, yes that still outweighs what it is. And yes, it's gonna be uncomfortable. If you're someone that every weekend goes shopping with your girlfriends and then suddenly you go, hang on, I'm gonna change what I'm doing, you there is gonna be that uncomfortability around it, where you either have to say to them, I'm not gonna come every week now. It's only me once a month. Or these having those conversations around, actually this is what I'm doing now, so I'm not gonna be doing this. I'm still happy to come with you, but I won't be shopping at all that whatever it is. Your choice, your version of that. But it is just being aware that nothing is going to come easy to you, and particularly when you are going to be stepping out of that safe and boring box. So just being prepared, like really nutting it out to figure out what is it that you can suffer and be prepared for that uncomfortability to go, actually this is this is what I'm doing, and the conversations and stuff that could come out from that.

Mel: And I think it's a really unpopular thing to say, that we wanna suffer because I think we think that we shouldn't have to. That you get to an age where, but I shouldn't have to suffer, I shouldn't have to be worried about that anymore. I shouldn't be suffering for that anymore. And I think of that Pantine ad 'because you are worth it'. And I think we've really twisted that to say I'm worth it. I'm worth enjoying today, or I'm worth just having everything now. When actually 'you're worth it' is more, I believe, around you are worth it in that you are worth being extraordinary. You are worth having choice. You're worth having options, not just that short-term gratification. And yes, I love me a bit of short-term gratification but I'm not gonna do that at the expense of those future goals and those things I really want. So I think such an important one.

The next one is to decide what 'safe' looks like for you. And to have that but don't live there. And that's why we said that it's really important to still have safe we still want you to have a buffer account. We still want you to have some safe assets where you might have some liquidity. Depending on your age and stage, you may choose what you are investing in or not. It might be with your business that you choose to have some stability of income in there, as well as that moonshot, for example. The 'safe' in the business for us looks really, I think really looks like doubling down on what we do really well, but also having the membership option after the My Financial Adulting Plan because that's our annuity income. So it's figuring out what ' safe' looks for you, but understand that doesn't have to be it. And actually it's dangerous if that's it. And I think it's a really important point to mention because we still want you to be safe. We still want you to be boring. We want you to have great habits. We want you to have that beautiful base, but we don't want it's like laying down a beautiful slab and sitting back and going, whoa, doesn't that look good? And then pitching your tent and living there, hell no. Like we wanna build the house. And that can look however you want it to look, that we don't just wanna live on the slab. We want it to be a beautiful slab. We don't want it to be sandy slab, but we wanna ultimately build the house.

Lawsie: And I think to add on to that too, that what' safe' looks like for you now can change. And it isn't this like a definitive thing of this is what it has to be. So if you're someone that's single and living your best life, what your version of 'safe' now is could be very different to what it is in five or 10 years time when potentially have a partner and kids like your level of 'safe' might be different.

Mel: And then it might change again when the kids leave.

Lawsie: Oh, absolutely. And when you've stopped work and all of these different things. So it is looking at what is 'safe' for you now and then just putting that little finger out to say, what can I do that'll move it just a little bit further.

Mel: Remarkable for me might be wearing a magenta pink suit. Remarkable for you might be wearing a black blazer that's all angled. They're both right, but it's figuring out what's right for you, what's 'safe' is still in there and then having the courage to frigging wear it.

The next one and we've got three to go is to be honest, are you taking enough of a risk? Because sometimes it's really easy to go, oh my gosh, this is so risky. And it may feel like that at the moment. So for example, you might look at the pricing in your business and the risk of increasing your prices. You're like, I can put it up by 2%. That might seem risky to you, but if you haven't asked your customers, if you haven't figured out what they value, if you haven't figured out how to increase your average price from doing things other than simply raising it by 2%, that might not be enough of a risk.

The same could be true of investing in shares or a whole host of other things. So it's be honest with yourself, are you taking enough of risk? And you'll know. We see too many people that are like, oh no, I couldn't possibly live on less than this. I couldn't possibly change my lifestyle. BS. Bullshit.

You can. It's just going back to that original point or the earlier point. What are you prepared to suffer before? And then be honest. Are you taking enough of a risk?

Lawsie: And same deal too, that level of risk is going to change. I was talking with a lady this morning and she was saying that all year, so this is since beginning of January, we're now mid-April. Her goal has been that she's got some funds set aside and she wants to invest it and she still hasn't because she's analysis by paralysis. But I guarantee when she's actually ripped that bandaid off and done the first investment, she'll go, oh, okay, it's not so bad. And then it'll start becoming part of her habit and she'll be coming more comfortable with it. And again, then she's gonna have to reassess this again and go, am I now just being too safe and comfortable? And do I need to invest in something else that's just pushing me out of my comfort zone a little?

Mel: Or invest more or borrow to invest etc

Lawsie: Exactly. So many things. So again, and I know we said that before, what does safe look like? And that can change, but it's exactly the same too with your risk. Cause it's like anything, once you become more comfortable with it, then can be prepared to step a little bit further out and give something a go.

Mel: True. I've seen you in colour. You take risks.

Lawsie: Occasionally. As I sit here in black today,

Mel: So true. The second last one is to learn, to educate, to grow around those things you need to upskill around. So obviously looking at our masterclass, and jumping on the wait list for the My Financial Adulting Plan. Listening to podcasts, reading books. How you grow, how you move away from that boring and into that remarkable and have options, is actually start to get interested. So to educate and grow around those things, you need to upskill around as you identify them during this process. That's a really important step. Simple, short, easy.

Lawsie: Done. So our last one is just freaking do it.

Mel: They should have a slogan of that.

Lawsie: Oh, wonder what that's been influenced by. As we've said, and I think you would've picked up the theme through here, life is short. It's never gonna be perfect. So don't just keep living in that safe and boring. Work through the tips and figure out what is it that you can do, if it's not today, within the next week or the next month, just to try and push yourself out of that a little bit more, and then keep going. Keep going.

Mel: Yeah, and if you wanna really easy kind of daily smoothie start to push you into out of your comfort zone we'll put a link as well for our seven day Financial Self Care challenge. Where it's seven days of us and tips, and hopefully that'll just start, as you said, Lawsie with getting you comfortable. All like all of these tips, reducing the nose surrounding yourself with cheerleaders. For $9, it's a beautiful way to start implementing this and becoming a little less boring.

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