Uncensored Money Season Eight: If I Was Turning 40 Again, Here’s What I’d Do Differently (Money Edition)

Melissa Browne: Ex-Accountant, Ex-Financial Advisor, Ex-Working Till I Drop, Now Serial Entrepreneur & Author, Financial Wellness Advocate, Living a Life by Design | 26/02/2026

Show Notes

Turning 40 isn’t a crisis.
It’s clarity.

In this episode, Mel and LL unpack what they’d do differently financially if they were entering their 40s again. From investing myths to hormone health, divorce realities and reinvention.

Because here’s the truth:
Your 40s aren’t too late.
They’re often where confidence, income and courage finally align.

We cover:

• Why women (but not men) think they’ve “left it too late” to start investing
• How $500 per month invested for 30 years could approach $1 million
• Why investing doesn’t have to be complicated (yes, even one broad-based ETF can be enough)
• The mortgage obsession trap and why paying it off first doesn’t always “math”
• The real overspending stats behind Buy Now Pay Later (+54%) and credit cards (+18%)
• The $17 billion impact of perimenopause and menopause on Australian women’s earnings and super
• Brain fog, automation and protecting your financial decision-making during hormonal transitions
• Why your 40s are peak divorce years and how to protect your financial independence
• Why 40 is not “too old” to start something bold (and the women who prove it)

This episode isn’t about panic.
It’s about power.

If you’re in your 40s this isn’t a warning. It’s an invitation.

You still have time.
But only if you start

For more tips and resources, visit us at melissabrowne.com.au, on Facebook, Instagram or TikTok @MelBrowne.Money or send us an email at hello@melissabrowne.com.au.

Links mentioned in the episode are below

Find $10K in 12 Months Freebie can be found at melissabrowne.com.au/find$10kin12months

Share Investing Masterclass can be found at melissabrowne.com.au/shares

Dare to be Wealthy can be found at melissabrowne.com.au/books

Finally, if you love this episode please make sure you subscribe, share it with a friend and leave us a review.

Transcription

Mel: So turning 40 isn't dramatic, even though it can feel like that at the time. And honestly, I feel like the fifth floor had a whole lot more drama than turning 40. I felt so unbothered turning 40. And I think maybe I hadn't really gone into the depths of perimenopause. I felt good still. So it was just like, ah, we're clicking over. Law-dog what about you? Welcome to the fourth floor.

Lawsie: Thank you.

Mel: What do you feel when you turn 40?

Lawsie: No different to any other time, I think. Like it wasn't, I know some people 40 is that real, ⁓ sort of turning point or that sticking point for them. But I think probably because so many of my friends are older anyway, and I'm always have perpetually always been the youngest. was the youngest at school. I was the youngest in the workplace for so long. Like all of those things age to me isn't as big a deal. ⁓ but it is funny now when I go, yeah, I did that a couple of decades ago. Like that's when I feel older when I'm looking past but in terms of turning 40 itself I was like, man, here's what it is, another day.

Mel: It is what it is. Yeah, I really felt that too. But as I said, it wasn't until it was in my 40s and in the group of perimenopause that I really struggled the most in this decade. And I struggled in different decades for different reasons, but that one hit me hard. But for so many women in their 40s, it's an important one. It's one of change again, of clarity, but also risk.

Because in Australia at the moment, there are almost 400,000 women at risk of homelessness, which is why this episode is so important. Because if Lawsie was turning 40 again, or if I was back in my 40s, and I think you were here, you turned 40 a minute ago, Law-dog ⁓ here's what we do differently with money. Because that message I want you to hear in this episode is you're not too late, but you have to get intentional.

Lawsie: Six months, six, bye. ⁓

Mel: So number one would be, I wouldn't believe that investing was complicated or too late because only women believe that they've left it too late.

Lawsie: She's about to get on her soapbox rant early I can feel it take the floor

Mel: It's happening very early today.

Lawsie:  It is, I'm like, I think I really needed another cup of coffee before this, but here we go.

Mel: Yeah. Well see, we have meet so many financial planners and I know I've talked before about how when I talked to Owen from Rask about this, who had the Australian Investors podcast, I said to him, do blokes in their 40s or in any age feel this way? And he went, no. Blokes don't sit around thinking we miss the boat, but women do. And I think the reason why is we've kind of internalized this idea that if we didn't start at 22 or 32, we failed. And I think that's very much the ageist society that we live in that compounds that. But if we run the numbers, if you invest $500 every month for the next 30 years, according to Vanguard's 30 year index, and it's probably time to read the ASIC disclaimer before I do the reveal that

Anything that we talk about in this podcast is generally nature. It doesn't take into account your financial situation, objectives and needs. It's intended to be general advice ⁓ and make sure you read any relevant PDS before investing. So now that we've done that, we could reveal that you could get close to a million bucks from 500 bucks invested. And it's from consistency and simplicity and just one broad based ETF.

But Lawsie I mean, we've worked a lot in this space. We've had lots of conversations with women in this space. Why do you think they've left it too late?

Lawsie: I think because there is that thing of they go, oh, I'm 40 and I want to retire at 60. I've got less than 20 years. And so I think there's just this almighty panic and they sort of look at it and go, but I'm more than halfway there. But I'm like, they're forgetting that doesn't count when you're a child. And, you know, all of these things and that 20 years is still actually, or, you know, 10 years, if you have 49 going on to 50 is still such a long time to be able to make changes and to really have an impact rather than just going, I can't do it, it is too late. ⁓ But sometimes I think it's also people just feel like it's easier to say it's too late. Then, you know, they're not necessarily prepared to make changes or to go, okay, I am concerned about the future. So therefore, I'm going to change how I'm living now because, know, we're creatures of comfort and we like certain things and we've got to a certain point. And so to do that often means that there's got to be a big change. So I think there's

Mel: Hmm. Yes.

Lawsie: Lot of things sort of feeding into it, you know, on top of all the other stories and the media and everything else that can, you know, obviously feeds that as well. yeah, it's a common thing, but I feel like it shouldn't be and we need to change that.

Mel: It absolutely and I so hear what you're saying in the like the 40s, the 30s are busy, but the 40s can be chaotic almost like you're earning, but you're also dealing with perimenopause and not necessarily coping well with that. And you've potentially still got kids and now they're teenagers if you do, or you are going through a divorce or a separation. You don't want to have

Lawsie: Well, the kids are done and you're like, finally I've got more free time and more dollars to do things.

Mel: Have to deal with this and it does every time. Like every time I go into the Today Show though there's the same producer that's there for Today Extra. She always says to me when she asks what I'm talking about and I reckon she's a woman in her 40s and if I say I'm talking about investing she goes yeah that's complicated I probably should do something about that and it's not and I think that's what we really want you to hear today that investing is not complicated. It can be one broad based ETF invested over 30 years on one platform. Like it can be as simple as that. And if you don't believe this, we've got a shares masterclass. We're in 90 minutes, like less time than it takes to watch a romcom. You spend more time on your phone each week. I'll teach you how to invest in shares simply. One decision, one investing platform invested regularly. But understanding that understanding it's not complicated. I think that's where it changes. It doesn't take a lot of time and money. And we've got people in our community, Lawsie, that have started investing in their 30s, 40s, 50s because they finally get that.

Lawsie: Yeah, and it is, it's that challenging, that notion in those stories of, I've got to have money to do this and I've got to do this. And it's like, no, you can it for a dollar, like literally one dollar. And I think that's the thing, it's about educating yourself, understanding the big impact of those small changes that you make now can have and doing it in your forties.

Mel: Yeah

Lawsie: You've got more time. You've got more time than someone that starts in their 50s. And that's not to say that you can't start in your 50s because you absolutely can. ⁓ But it's yeah, the sooner you start, the better and no better time than your 40s.

Mel: Yeah. And you don't just have the time until you want to retire. It compounds beyond that. So I think it's understanding that, you know, women, 80%, the current state is 80 % of us are going to die alone. I mean, I'm with an elder gentleman. I know, but if we are abdicating this, if we're saying, oh, it's too hard, we are going to be the one on our own ultimately. So we have to look after ourselves.

Lawsie: Mm. Gee, that's positive news, isn't it?

Mel: So for me, that alone is reason enough to want to do something. can't afford to rely on someone else. As you said, it's we're coming with good news today. But the good news is you can do it simply and easily. But for you isn't too late to start investing, but you have to get moving. And that's the that is the message we want you to hear.

Point two is we would stop obsessing over being debt free at all costs. So once you understand you need to get moving and that you can invest simply. This one, I reckon, Lawsie is gonna make people twitch, but I would stop obsessing over being debt free at all costs. And let's be free. Let's be ⁓ clear. Sorry. I would run from credit cards and buy an hour late pay later. Like I ran from you when you turned up at Christmas a couple of years ago wearing Crocs.

Like I would run fleeing and we all should do that. But that's because after pay increases our spend by 54 % and I didn't make that up. That's according to their own website. They brag about this. They brag that they fleece you by 40, 54%. Credit cards by roughly 18 % and no points are worth that.

Lawsie: So bad debt? No, we're still fleeing from that. Yes, being debt free of that.

Mel: Yeah, absolutely. Always whenever possible, but thinking you're being financially virtuous or safe by just paying off your mortgage and you'll invest later, it just doesn't math. So we're to do some girl math we actually want you to understand today. So if your mortgage rate is 6%, putting every spare dollar into the home loan ignoring investing costs you time. Because the average rate of return for the share market over 30 years according to the Vanguard's 30 year index is 9.3. So you're missing out for Australian shares, thanks Law-dog. So you're missing out on 3 % by doing that and you're missing out on the compounding effects of that. And there is an old adage that you can't eat your house. So if you are just investing, sorry, you are just paying off your home and you're not investing, you don't have the choice that you think.

Lawsie: Australian Shares. Yeah. And it's not a case of like we're not one or the other. This or that, where, and so where, yes, you want to be paying off your house and your mortgage if you have one and to be investing.

Mel: Yeah, it's like all those ⁓ Clio quizzes. We're not coffee or tea. We're not shoes, heels or flats. We're not night or day. We're investing and paying off our mortgage. We do get to choose and ⁓ because it is about doing both. And if you're wondering how and if you're thinking with what Mel, in the show notes, we've talked about this so many times that we have a free resource called 25 plus ways to find 10K in 12 months. It's easier than you think to find more cash. And when you do, then you can put it towards things like this. Because, Law-dog is, I mean, why do you think, why do you, and I think I, we both know, because we've worked with so many people, but the psychology of that it feels safe to have my loan paid off.

Lawsie: Yeah, and I think it's just that thing of the mortgage is there. It's been, you know, no doubt you've been paying for a number of years. You're seeing it's a significant amount of your income that goes and there is, I think it's that longer term view as well of that security of going, but I own my house. Like if something happens, if I lost my job, if I want to take a sabbatical, if I want to go part time, like all of those things, if you've got that cost of housing gone, there is definitely a sense of security about that or it opens up more choice.

Mel: Yes, I get that.

Lawsie: But in some instances, but at what cost are you getting that, which is where that investing piece ultimately comes in.

Mel: Yeah, so we are not saying don't also pay a bit more. We're saying pay a little bit more and invest. And I think it's reminding people as well, because I know I meet, I talk to a lot of people that are really panicked that they're not going to be mortgage free by the time they retire or when they want to stop working. But I think we forget in Australia, certainly, that when we retire, we can grab a lump sum out of our super. So if you are not contributing the maximum to super, for example, because you're like, I just want to get this day paid off when I retire that there's more money that I'm able to put in super than pay off my mortgage because of the tax breaks available. And I can pull that out tax free and it's compounding and earning a return in super. So it's being aware there are some great strategies that maybe you don't know about because financial literacy is so low.

That means that we don't just want to focus on being debt free and we want to open up our thinking to sure I want to pay a bit more and also invest.

Lawsie: Yeah, and I think just to make that really clear, because I think we stopped our girl-math thing. ⁓ But if you're looking at interest rates, then, you know, on your mortgage or something, there might be somewhere at the moment, five to six percent subject to whatever changes happen later on in the year. But if we're then comparing to investing, investing, we're looking at...

Mel: Yes, thank you.

Lawsie: Potentially, you 9.3 % is the rate we use that was the average return of the Australian share market. So if you've got money that's going, you know, been putting in investing, we're talking about that earning 9.3 % or maybe even 11.7 % if we look over to the US share market for the same time period, compared to 6%, which is where we're saying, yes, you want to be, you know, potentially paying a bit more extra on your mortgage, particularly just for that safety. And so you're going, yes, I'm getting ahead and I'm beating the bank. But also then you've got these other investments going where they're actually earning more for you than what the interest rate that is getting charged, which is why it comes down to that whole piece of yes investing. And then by doing that, ultimately share markets, you know, ending on them performing how we expect. Then you're going to have more dollars there that you can free up to pay off that mortgage. And overall, you're still going to have more dollars than just focusing on the mortgage and saving your 6 % and missing out on earning 9, 10, 11%. depending on what the markets are doing.

Mel: Yeah, I still agree. I've likened it before to paying off your mortgage and that seat is kind of like just having a wardrobe full of activewear. Like you feel good when you want to work out, but that's it. Like we want to have choice and I'm never going to feel good with a wardrobe of activewear. might, Law-dog. But yeah, we need to add in at least a blazer in there for when you go out. But just a little bit of choice. Doesn't have to be a whole lot. You can have mainly activewear. We just want to add to that.

Lawsie: Yeah.

Mel: Point three is I understand the impact of hormones on my finances and this is one I love the hormones are now in the media we are talking about perimenopause which was the phrase I wasn't aware of when I was going through it ⁓ but if you are a woman we need to also talk about hormones and money and it's why I've included habits for your hormones in my new book dare to be wealthy

Now here it is just in case it's so pretty in case you haven't seen it. I know it pops off shelves, I'm very proud of it. But it is the very first finance book that has included a conversation around hormones, both if you are going through menstruation, if you are going through perimenopause or perimenopause. Because if I was in my 40s again,

Lawsie: No, I've not seen that before. Amazing.

Mel: I would deeply understand the impact my hormones have on my finances because perimenopause and menopause are estimated to cost Australian women around 17 freaking billion dollars per year in lost earnings in super. 17 billion dollars every single year.

Lawsie: I just can't believe it costs that much. And that's just Australia. Like that's not even global. That's just here in Oz.

Mel: Yeah, and I have to confess, Lawsie I...I looked at that numbers and re-looked it because I thought that can't be right. Like that has to be global. That can't just be yearly. That's and that's just lost earnings and super. Like that's not also the cost of managing symptoms, which is insane. But as someone who, looking back, started perimenopause in my late 30s, I spent a lot of money trying to manage my symptoms. And often those symptoms weren't just hot flushes because that's the one that we know about that everyone talks about. For me it was brain fog and fatigue and anxiety and confidence dips and sleep disruption and if you've experienced any of those and there's so many more besides I mean itchy ears honestly ⁓ itchy ears won't affect your earnings but all of those other things could it could affect earnings promotions business decisions investment decisions

So if I was in my 40s going through this again, I would start looking early for a great health professional. I would understand my options. And personally for me, MHRT was life changing, but I also know, so Hormone Therapy, I know that is not right for everyone. So it's keeping going until you find the option that's right for you. I had to kiss four doctors till I figured it out. And I wasted, I reckon, like six years.

It's planning for increased medical expenses during this time. Scans, medications, supplements, appointments. And if I was creating a finance kit for people in their 40s going through this, I would suggest you automate everything you can during this time. You build a mental health kit, you have support, and you send your partner the Imperfects podcast featuring Louise Newsome.

I sent that to my husband. He wouldn't read the books. He wouldn't do anything. He's a friggin health professional. He read that. Sorry, he listened to that and he got it. And I would not make huge, irreversible financial decisions while my hormones were in chaos.

Lawsie: Yeah, that's such a powerful reframe. It's not the doom and gloom. It's like acknowledging that it is what it is and it's going to happen. But how can you actually preempt it, be organized, you know, be prepared for it if you're not already there. And if you are there, things that you can still actually put in place now. ⁓ And so, yeah, you're looking at it going, I'm not going crazy. I'm not unstable. It is simply, inverted commas, a biological thing that females are going to go through. ⁓

Mel: Yeah, yeah, I thought I was.

Lawsie: I mean, I'm obviously lucky in the sense that I'm younger. You know, it's a different era where, you know, hormones and things like perimenopause and stuff are such a common thing for people to be talking about. I've been hearing it all through my 30s. And, know, which is a good thing. Like we shouldn't all have to be suffering about it. But yeah, I know, you know, from the conversations and stuff that we've had, you had no idea.

Mel: Yeah. Not a clerk.

Lawsie: None. And so yeah, I think this is, you know, then so powerful for anyone that is going to go through it or is in the middle of it. All of those things to sort of really just go, okay, yeah, these are the things that I can do. And yes, these things will help your finances, but it'll also just help you broader in a more broader sense as well.

Mel: I agree. And I mean, it'd be interesting for us to talk about the experience that I've had and also we've had heard of community members and clients have. But my personal experience was when I was filming What the Finance for Mamma Mia, I would have whole podcast episodes where I cannot remember what I said. Like my brain fog was so bad. And in podcasts, you can say, can you just repeat what I said again and pause and ask them to redo, but not for whole fricking episodes. And I was so ashamed and full of anxiety. Like when I listen back now, I absolutely switched metaphors around and said things that I'm like, ⁓ would I have said that again? Or I did some filming with these gorgeous young women that were probably 12. No, they were in their early 20s and I was in the middle of a hot flash and I've taken a video of this so I can, and I've shared this on my socials before. I was wet and I was mortified and I'm not, wasn't, like I find filming quite easy. I knew what I wanted to say, but I was wet from a hot flash and they stopped the filming and just went, oh, do you want it? Just powder. And I'm like, oh yeah, it's really hot in here under the lights. It wasn't, but I was just so in the grip of.

And I've talked to women that are in have been in boardroom situations where they've forgotten presentations or where they are in businesses going, I just don't feel confident in my ability anymore. Or I love my husband deeply. There was moments during when I was in the group of perimenopause where we were on the couch together and the fact that he would breathe and I could hear it. Like I just wanted to lean over and shh and I did a couple of times I would just put his lips together and go I can hear you and that what I know is people are dropping part-time they are selling businesses they are leaving like they're retiring early or they are leaving marriages because of symptoms and yet when they get those under control they're having the most incredible regret.

Like I sold a business during perimenopause and it was the right decision. I'm really glad that I did it. But for someone else, it isn't. And then you've got to in your late 40s or 50s, try and catch up again or re-enter the workforce. And we know how difficult that can be. Now ⁓ the Australian Superannuation Association has said if you drop, if you leave the workforce five years early, it's going to cost a woman 60k.

But if you compound that out, it's a whole lot more. And I'm just concerned that we already have so many gaps for women, whether it's career gaps, wage gaps, maternity gaps, super gaps. And here is another gap where we really need to be catching up.

Lawsie: Yeah, but just to add to that too, there's also, you decide, like you sold your business during that time, if you decide to go part time, I mean, you know, all of those things, totally still like, hey, to be doing it in this era, but it's just making sure that you're doing it for the right reasons. And it's not that you're doing it in reaction to something else that is beyond your control. Where, you know, and then like you said, five, 10 years down the track, then you have the biggest regret about it just because you didn't understand what was actually going on.

Mel: Conscious, yeah.

Yeah, so you putting money aside so that you can afford ⁓ to do those things and to get that under control and then prioritizing managing your symptoms when they appear. you know, I had a, part Chinese, I had the most incredible doctor since I was 13 who was also Chinese. And when I went to her at first and I got the blood test and I burst into tears, she said to me, well, you don't want to go on to it to HRT and I went, okay, no. And then she handed me a jar of yam, something, yam cream and said, rub that on your thighs. I mean, like this is what, and I have the, that she was the most incredible doctor. She's so well respected. I love her dearly. I now have a different doctor because that is just so not right. So you know what I mean? Yeah. So it's just being aware of that, not accepting just because a doctor says to you, hey, you don't want this and here's something that you go, oh, okay. Like we need to really advocate for our own health and make sure we prioritize this. Oh my gosh, I have so many soap up moments today. But this, think this is, as someone that has been through it and really suffered through it, I think if I was in a job, I would have really struggled. I would have looked like such an inept employee and really potentially one that their heart wasn't in it. ⁓ Because it's not weakness, it is a season and it is managing the symptoms so that you can show up in all areas of your life, including your financial life the best. So, you know, just to move away from that, Lord Doctor Point Four, I'd really protect myself financially and legally. We're really hitting the big ones today. This is not a light and fluffy episode.

Because 40s are when divorce peaks. And we talked about making those decisions you might regret during perimenopause. But also it's the decisions that you are, that are conscious that you are know this is right for me. Or sadly, like we have seen so way too many times is when a one partner will just look at the other and go, yeah, that's it. And you just are not prepared for that financially, mentally, emotionally.

So 40s, you might not be aware, is when divorce peaks. And the average age is 44 for women and 47 for the blokes. But whether it's you or not making that decision, it's not about fear, it's about protection.

Lawsie: Yeah, and we like, as you just said before, we do see way too many women that separation comes as a shock to them or too many that are staying in marriages and relationships that aren't serving them because they think that they can't afford to leave. So.

Mel: Yeah, yeah, and my gosh, we see that a lot, don't we? The number of conversations we're having with women where they want to leave but feel like they don't have a choice is enormous. But having money on your own, your own bank account, your own investments, or even access and understanding what you have, not secret or adversarial, just independent, that's important no matter your age or stage, but particularly in your 40s. And I would understand our joint investment and assets because most people don't realize it's that 90 % of women are managing the household budget. This is according to the latest UBS wealth report. Yet less than 50 % of women are involved with a long-term decisions of investing. And yes.

Lawsie: And it's understanding liabilities as well. Like yes, investments, yes assets. But I know, you know, like we've spoken to so many people, I heard the stories of people where it's, they thought that they were doing okay. They didn't realize all the debt that was underlying the lifestyle and everything. And then suddenly separate. And it's like, actually, I thought I had X amount position and I'm walking away with a whole lot of debt, not even, you know, money for a deposit or for something else. So it is understanding all aspects, assets, investments, as well as debt.

Mel: Yeah. think to Lawsie mean, how would you start that conversation if you've never been involved before and you don't want to raise a red flag for your partner to go, why, why do you want to know this? Like it should just be, this is genuinely shared. Like how would you bring up if you've never been involved before and you're like, crap, I really need to understand this.

Lawsie: I think it's even with your own actions, like if you're starting to show that you're more interested in it in general, rather than just, you know, we're scheduling a meeting and we're sitting down, we're going to eyeball each other over the kitchen table ⁓ and going hard. Like that, of course, is going to have people going, what on earth is it? But if you're starting to read more finance books, if you're starting to do a course, if you're talking about it in a more general sense, then I think that's one, is it's going to be useful for you anyway. So regardless, gold star for you for doing it. But also then your partner is seeing it like it's a natural evolution where it's, oh, they're starting to take an interest in this. Oh, of course they starting to ask questions and things like that. So it's not accusatory. It's not anything like that where, you know, partners can suddenly go, hang on, do you...

Lawsie: You don't fit, you know, they're going to become more defensive. Yeah. And I mean, we've seen the positive effects of that where some people have been like, ⁓ my goodness, I'm so glad that you've, you're now showing an interest in this and we can do this and we can be doing this as a partner. Like, I don't think it's, I think people are more nervous about things that it could be going wrong. Whereas your partner might actually be really damn relieved that you are showing an interest in it. ⁓ but like I said, I think it has to be that.

Mel: Hmm, do you not trust me? Yeah.

Lawsie: That evolution is that way of showing your interest at asking more general questions. And then it continues to open up that conversation. And if you're not getting that sort of positive reception to it in things, well, then it's also then starting to understand why. And, you know, why is the reason that something that should be joined and should be shared is being withheld from you? Like that would kind of raise some more flags that I'd be wanting to then dig into a little bit further as well.

Mel: Yeah. And initial reason that your partner, and you're right, we have had some people in our community where their partner has said, thank God, like, I really have felt the load carrying this, please come and be part of this. So we just want to acknowledge that, that there's a chance that's what your partner will say. But there's also a chance your partner will say, don't worry about it, I've got it. And they think they're being really helpful. And I think it's on you then to say, I love that. And I don't doubt you've got that but I want to be involved too and I should be involved too. So let's do this together now. And I think that's a really hard thing to argue because you are acknowledging you have got it. You've had it up to now and I really appreciate it. But now I want to be involved. And it is just maybe it's a regular, you know, once a month you go get coffee and you look at it like you have that date. ⁓ Hubby and I have Sunday, communication Sunday, where every Sunday as we're walking, we just talk about stuff and it's always talking about financial stuff as well. What are you doing this week? Where are we at? What do we need to be cooking? What are you doing with the goals that we said that we set this year? What am I doing? Maybe how the superfund is doing or we're up to with this and that. Like it's just part of our conversation now. But if you don't create that habit of it being something that you talk about regularly, you won't bring it up if it's not something you're used to.

So yeah, it is starting to know the numbers, starting to stop seceding or abdicating financial control. And if your partner just refuses and continually refuses, understand that that could be financial control. And it might be at that point that you speak to a financial, like to a therapist or someone that could then help you understand how can you bring this up? Is this genuinely financial control?

We're going to put some stuff in the show notes around what the signs are for. Signs are for that because that is a real thing. And I think if we're talking about this here, it's really important to acknowledge that most people should be eventually really happy to include you in the conversation. But if there's ultimate refusal, then there's a whole word for that. And that's something that is simply not okay.The final thing ⁓ I would do is I would tell myself I wasn't too old to start something new. Because this is definitely that ageist thing that as women that we are put on that the guys just don't get that same message. And we get this from how, you know, I was just thinking about this recently with everything that has been released in the world in the ickiness of Epstein, even to you know, why do women shave under their arms other than Lawsie and I wouldn't cope and their legs and how we dress? Like there is an expectation that we will look younger, that we will. There's an ageism that happens and a no, no, you know, you are you are best accepted or relevant when you are a particular age. And if you age past that, then unless you can keep up, you're kind of you. It's too late for you. And I mean, way too many women that have gobbled down that message and just accept it. And here we just want to bust it open and say, no, like absolutely not. So I read some back on my soap box again, probably for the fourth time, Lawsie, and I'm okay with this because if I'm really passionate about this age and all ages, but I want to share some stories of women in their forties, maybe you've heard of them, to really give you a bit of a shake. Vera Wang started her fashion label at 40.

Sarah Blakely, who started Spanx, didn't start that till 41. Julia Child, for anyone that loves cooking, ⁓ published her very first cookbook at age 49. Reese Witherspoon built her billion dollar production company, Hello Sunshine, in her 40s. And I sold my accounting business in my 40s and reinvented that in my 40s to the most successful business that I have started yet.

Your 40s are not the end of the story, but they're often that point where clarity and confidence and life experience and sometimes even courage finally meet.

Lawsie: Yeah, you're definitely not behind. Like I look and just go, there's still so much time in front of me. ⁓ And I'd say if anything, you are more experienced. You've gone through your 20s, you've gone through your 30s, you're clearer generally on what you like, what you don't like, what you'll tolerate, what you won't tolerate, all of those things. And so yes, it's so easy for us to able to say that.

Mel: Yeah.

Lawsie: You can absolutely feel like time's just flying by, particularly if you're in the midst of, you know, trying to balance career and family and all of those things as well. And also just, I can't be bothered. Like, I just don't want to do something else, but it's, you know, you've not left it too late. And I think it's really important that people realize that.

Mel: Yeah. And we have so many, so many stories in our community, all of you who, of women who've invested for the first time in their 40s, started businesses, their first home, rebuilt after divorce and more. But also, you if we look in Australia, there was a 40 podcast that was very successful for a long time that Lisa and Sarah started. They then pivoted in their 40s to start a business, Disco Club, that has gone absolutely gangbusters. And if you think, disco club and nightclubs, you're probably thinking 20s? There's women in their 40s starting something for other women in their age that I think their latest one had, their latest one has 5,000 people and they're doing it nationally. So it's realizing you're not limited. Whether it's a business idea, whether it is investing, whether it is something else.

Lawsie: Okay. And it's also that it doesn't have to be business. Like if you're an employee, there's nothing to say that you don't.

Mel: Yes. Yes.

Lawsie: Pivot and start in a different industry that you don't start again. If you have a business, you go, just can't be bothered. I'm done with that now, but I actually want to go and work in a corporate. want it like all of those things. It's not just that you, know, your forties has to be that reinvention or that I'm starting the business. It can be in all aspects or it might be where you go actually really happy career wise, but then I'm going to use this time to now explore other things that I want to do instead. yeah, it's yeah, don't, don't write yourself off with that.

Mel: Yeah. I mean you and your husband both, left, he like he closed his business in his 40s. You've dropped out part-time, you've bought a van, you have van life, like you've been, you've done big things in your 40s. Probably people in their 20s, you might think, that's something that someone in their 20s might do like, or ultimately in their 60s when they retire and you're like hell no, I'm not waiting till then and I didn't want to do it then. So like it's, yeah, I love that point. don't, it doesn't have to be business, doesn't have to be investing, but it is having the courage to actually do it, realizing you haven't left it too late. So if you are in your 40s listening to this, I want you to understand this episode isn't a warning and we are not judging. Instead, it's an invitation or a call to action to let you know you absolutely freaking literally still have time, but only if you start.

 

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